We are Beautiful
While I was thinking of editing what I had originally written, I saw a video my friend Chris Brogan shared on Facebook yesterday.
Minutes before, I had been on the beach enjoying time with my daughter. I met a beautiful woman through a common friend who was also enjoying the beach with her daughter. At one point the conversation led to talking about my friend Andres and his personal training framework.
At that moment I sort of sensed that her being the only female in the group, talking about exercise and the gym, might have made her uncomfortable. But more importantly, I felt a bit out of place since I have not been training as I know I should.
Struggling with Weight and Body Image Issues
I have struggled with my weight all my life. When I was in the military, I even had some slight anorexia that got me into some health problems. Being labeled overweight in the military was bad enough. Luckily when I got my body fat measured, I never was officially overweight.
Men also Have their Insecurities
When Chris shared the video on how women perceived themselves on beauty vs average, it made me realize its not only women that feel this way.
Men are insecure on occasions about their image and body. In my previous relationships, I was insecure and allowed the other person to control certain decisions.
So what does this have to do with business?
The same way we have body image issues and we are not happy with our weight, we are sometimes harsh on the work we do.
When others decide to call our work crap, we take their word for it too many times. Some take it as far as to lower their rates because their work is not good enough yet.
Filtering Feedback
I listen to feedback and sometimes I use to get obsessed with it. But the reality is that those that provide feedback only usually know very little of the full story.
They don’t know that I grew up in the inner city or that I was in the military.
That I pushed myself through college with most of the help coming from my uncle and grandmother (the GI Bill was not enough.)
There are those who decide to criticize me; I still hide certain situations of my darkest memories and share only with a handful of folks.
Compliments Make a Difference
What I want you to know is that when you compliment me on my photography or my writing, it helps me. In the video, we see others pressuring their beautiful friends towards the beautiful door. The feedback I get from the outside has helped me understand my role on this earth.
For so long I felt out of place and tried to follow what others were doing. In other words, I am clear that I am Not Normal.
As I try new things, I realize that every jump, hop, or step I take is following my heart.
Thank you for the compliments and thank you for reading this.
Now can I ask you for a quick favor.
Share one thing that reminds you that you are beautiful.
Who can you compliment today that you think is beautiful and awesome.
Go ahead and like Nike’s slogan would say:
Do it.
I am beautiful because I have a heart full of love. And as much as I may wish for outer beauty, I have finally understood that a loving heart is what I treasure most about myself. And p.s. I see that same beauty in you, and in the mutual friends who brought us together